Reasons men may not report domestic violence

At Stange Law Firm, we believe that regardless of whether you are male or female, you have the right to feel safe, particularly at home. However, domestic violence against men happens in the United States, including Kansas, every day. The Crime Report cites data from the Centers for Disease Control indicating that the portion of men in the United States who experience stalking and/or violence of a physical or sexual nature at the hands of an intimate partner (including but not limited to spouses) at some point in their lives is approximately one-third. The percentage of men who experience psychological aggression from intimate partners is even higher, at 34.3%.

If you are one of the millions of men who experience domestic violence at some point in their lives, you should know that you do not deserve this kind of treatment and you have the right to seek help. Unfortunately, however, many abused men never report the domestic violence they endure. There are a number of reasons for this reluctance.

1. You may not recognize the behavior as abuse

Abuse involves not only physical violence but psychological manipulation to make you believe that this type of behavior is acceptable, or that you did something to earn it.

2. You fear the authorities may not believe you

Unfortunately, the stereotypical belief that men are abusers and women are victims is so deeply ingrained in the collective consciousness that many men need to provide concrete evidence of the abuse, and even then, it may not be enough to convince law enforcement.

3. You think that other people may not take it seriously

The henpecked husband of a shrewish wife has been a comedy trope for so long that some people do not recognize the serious implications of abuse against men even when they witness it happening.

4. You may not think that there is help available

You may be under the impression that domestic violence resources are only available for women. However, this is not true. As awareness of the domestic violence against men increases and the stigma associated with it decreases, it is becoming more common to see specialized resources for abused men offered. Even where specialized resources are not available, most domestic violence shelters and hotlines will help male as well as female victims.

There are legal avenues available to you as well. While it can sometimes be a challenge, you may be able to obtain a protective order from the court that can prevent future instances of harassment or violence by a spouse or domestic partner. More information about protective orders is available on our website.